From Grief to Resilience: A senior's counselling journey

Mdm N overcome her grief through counselling (Image/AI generated)

Client Background

Mdm N is a 70-year-old single elderly woman, referred by a hospital social worker following the death of her older sister — her only companion and caregiving partner for decades. Having resigned from her job to care for her sister through a long battle with cancer, Mdm N’s life lost its structure and meaning after the loss. She now lives alone in a three-room flat. Most of her siblings have passed on, and she has limited contact with nieces and nephews. Her social network is minimal, and she experienced profound emotional isolation.

Initial Assessment and Risk Profile

During the initial intake, Mdm N shared sentiments such as:

“I’ve done everything in life. I’m just waiting for the end.”

Though she did not show signs of active suicidal ideation, her statements reflected passive death wishes and emotional resignation. A suicide risk screening was conducted. While no immediate danger was identified, a safety plan and regular monitoring were implemented to support her.

Counselling Approach and Progress

The assigned counsellor focused on creating a stable, empathetic space for Mdm N to explore her grief. Sessions centred on:

• Grief psychoeducation: Normalising her emotional fluctuations and helping her articulate her sense of loss.

• Emotion regulation techniques: Grounding exercises and breathing techniques to process anger and sadness.

• Reframing identity: Supporting her to rediscover her purpose and self-worth beyond her past role as a caregiver.

• Reconnecting with daily routines: Gradual re-engagement with community activities and self-care practices.

Over time, Mdm N became more aware of her emotional patterns and more capable of expressing her needs.

Navigating New Risks

As she grew emotionally stronger, Mdm N began exploring social media and digital tools. While this helped reduce her sense of isolation, it also exposed her to potential online exploitation. One day, she revealed she had been chatting online with a new acquaintance. The counsellor identified signs of a potential romance scam and acted swiftly. Educational sessions were provided on:

• Online safety and scam awareness

• Setting digital boundaries

• Protecting personal and financial information

Mdm N was receptive and cautious, avoiding any financial or personal disclosures at that point. However, several months later, a man claiming to be a police officer contacted her, insisting that her bank account had been hacked and instructing her to withdraw SGD 200,000 to "secure" her funds. Distressed — as she did not have such a large sum — she confided in a visiting O’Joy para-counsellor. The para-counsellor noticed a suspicious man inside her house and immediately raised the alarm. The para-counsellor and the assigned counsellor promptly intervened, escorting Mdm N to the police station to file a report. Thanks to this swift action, no financial loss occurred, and her safety was protected.

Impact and Gratitude

Today, Mdm N is emotionally stable, socially aware, and equipped with the knowledge to protect herself from emotional harm and financial exploitation. Her progress is a testament to the power of consistent, compassionate support.

Through dedicated grief counselling, regular risk and suicide assessments, and timely scam prevention education, she was able to regain a sense of safety, confidence, and control over her life.

The coordinated intervention by her counsellor and para-counsellor not only safeguarded her wellbeing but also reinforced the importance of community-based care in protecting vulnerable seniors.